In December, many parents feel overwhelmed by the volume of things on our to-do lists multiplied by feelings of obligation. Social calendars fill up, expectations rise, kids feel both excited and overstimulated, and we feel caught in a spin of conflicting feelings and demands.
If you’ve felt this December overwhelm building, you are not alone — it’s the nature of the season.
I’ve been practicing a three-step process multiple times a day to interrupt the spin and ground myself. I thought you might enjoy trying this process, too.
Center, Let Go, Do One Thing
These brief, clear steps help me become present and focused, which makes me feel more relaxed. As I realize what is most important to me in a given moment, the scatter falls away. I focus on one thing at a time, many times a day. My inner calm helps not only me, but the people around me, too.
Instead of pushing harder, staying up late, or trying to “power through,” we can pause and reset. Here’s a simple three-step practice you can use anytime overwhelm takes over.
Step 1 — Center Yourself
When you notice yourself rushing, your mind racing, or your body tightening with anxiety, pause.
If your kids are around you, invite them to join you, or just model closing your eyes and going within.
Take a slow inhale.
Then let your exhale be longer than your inhale.
Do this three times.
As your breath lengthens, your parasympathetic nervous system activates — lowering stress, calming your body, and clearing your mind. If it helps, place your hands on your heart and feel their warmth.
Come back to your center.
Be with yourself for a moment inside the swirl. Notice what’s coming up and swirling around you with a bit more detachment – see it, but more as a storm passing through you instead of being the storm.
Ask yourself, “What do I need right now?”
You may not be able to attend to your needs right away, but your awareness of what you need will help you meet your needs more easily over the course of the day or week.
Step 2 — Let Go of the "Shoulds"
From this centered place, notice which “shoulds” you’re carrying today:
- “I should make a list and get organized…”
- “I have to buy gifts for everyone…”
- “I need to do something thoughtful for my kids’ teachers…”
- I’ve got to get my kids to help pick up their mess.
Choose just one of these shoulds to gently set down for this moment.
You’re not abandoning it — you’re releasing the pressure to carry it all at once.
Then ask yourself:
“What matters most today?”
By noticing and letting go of some of the swirl and weight, you are more free to get clear on what really matters in the big scheme of life, or at least for that brief stretch of time.
Maybe you need to give your child or teen your full attention for 10 minutes. Perhaps you need to take an hour to be by yourself to make a plan of how to approach a task. Or it’s possible that you need to ask for help, or change how you’ve always done something to experiment with a new approach.
What could you let go of so that you can focus on one thing at a time?
Step 3 — Do One Thing
From a calmer, clearer place within yourself, choose one meaningful thing to accomplish today, or in the next few hours.
Say it out loud:
“For right now, I will…”
Let that be enough.
When we choose one thing at a time, pressure eases. Space opens.
We often find ourselves truly enjoying the thing we chose to do.
We also act more in alignment with our values.
The other things will still be there — and some will sort themselves out with little effort.
Stories from the field
Wondering what this could look like in daily life?
These past few weeks, several of my parent coaching clients shared stories of natural resolution once they released the urge to control everything.
One parent mentioned a worry in a group chat, and someone else immediately took it on. People want to help; when we name a pathway for good, others often step in.
Another parent told her teens she was overwhelmed by the messy kitchen and needed 20 minutes to calm down. When she returned, the counters were cleaned and dishes were in the dishwasher. She felt a rush of gratitude. (This won’t always happen, but when we express our needs without blame or shame, people often respond with care.)
A third parent stopped trying to get her family to gather things to give away and just started on her own. Later that week, her husband and son were doing the same. By letting go of forcing the process, she inspired it instead.
Why This Works
This reset — Center | Let Go | Choose One Thing — is powerful because it simplifies your inner landscape. It brings you back to your wise center and reduces the mental load that fuels overwhelm.
Your nervous system calms.
You clarify your priorities.
A sense of purpose and peace replaces the swirl.
And sometimes, you invite others in to support you, which helps them feel good and helps you feel grateful.
I use this reset many times a day when I feel December overwhelm rising. With just a few breaths, my mind settles. I notice the “shoulds” and gently let them go. After I reconnect with what matters most, I take one step, then another. Before long, I feel more relaxed, present, and grateful — the energy I want to embody this season.
Try it and see how you feel. I’d love to hear what you notice
Closing Thoughts
We work hard as parents all year long. It feels good to have a holiday season that feels spacious, meaningful, and joyful — not frantic.
When you pause to center yourself, release the shoulds, and consciously choose one thing to focus on at a time, you create that spaciousness. You soften your internal pace. You give your children the gift of your calmer presence.
You parent from your wise, centered self — and everything else flows more smoothly.
Want More Support?
Here are three ways I can support you this month:
- Enjoy a Complimentary Clarity Call
If parenting has felt heavy, confusing, or urgent, you don’t have to navigate it alone. You can schedule a 30-minute call to get clear, work through a challenge, and feel supported. - Give yourself an Inner Counselor Process Session with me
You’ll walk away feeling nourished, more compassionate toward yourself, and grounded with images and mantras that support you when things feel hard. This is an incredibly efficient way to shift out of old patterns and coping mechanisms that no longer serve you. Several clients have told me this was exactly what they needed this month.
(Email me am*@********ns.com with the subject “Inner Counselor” to learn more.) - Explore my Featured Blogs for further support
Choose the topics that speak to you — they’re designed to help you reconnect with calm, clarity, and presence.
Note: All images from Unsplash: Credits to Getty Images, Michelle McEwen, Boris Bobrov, Brett Jordan and Getty Images in order of appearance
Related Blog Posts:
Below are some blogs to help with this holiday time and reflect on how you want the new year to feel.
Search by topics that interest you on my website.
Don’t see a topic you searched for? Send me a message or add a comment below to share what you’d like help on. I’ll take those requests into account as I plan my blogs for the coming months.
December Calm: 5 Powerful Parenting Mantras
Find your calm this season with five powerful parenting mantras you can use in tense moments to help you stay centered and connected with your children.
Your Holiday Tool Belt
A concise guide to building a mindful “holiday tool belt,” offering simple strategies to help parents stay calm, centered, and connected during the busy holiday season.
How to Choose Your Word of the Year
A gentle guide to choosing a Word of the Year — helping you reflect, set intention, and select a meaningful word to anchor your growth and choices in the year ahead.
